so many thoughts running through my head. i feel the need to just flush it all out.

first and foremost, to the author of the previous post - i will reply to that post, in a separate post entirely. to clump everything that has happened between us... 7 years of skeletons buried in our closet.. with this post of trivial ramblings does you no justice at all.

now.... a few entries back, i actually posted up photos of my room which featured my pretty crutches. and i think i very well jinxed myself that moment by saying i hope i didnt need to use them very soon. because on monday, i found myself in a situation similar to that of st james power station, only that i was walking to uni when it happened. needless to say, i never made it to uni and spent the day in hosp. to cut the grandmother story short, i have the fugliest leg brace ever to support that dodgy knee. and i will have to go for orthopedic treatment/physiotherapy during my exams. this is pure shit. but what can i do, really. i should have shut up about the crutches in the first place. now my pits are sore and swollen once again.

this following segment is specially dedicated to all the people who think that i am smart. no guys, rachel is definitely far from being a genius. to substantiate my point: i failed my first ever law assignment. intellectual property. i score an abysmal 8.5 out of 20. i haven't seen my paper just yet, but the blow to me was massive. i have never ever ever failed a single paper in my entire life. i have always scrapped heaps of passes. but to fail?? now, i couldn't swallow that. even though i was so tired/burnt out after submitting 4 papers beforehand, this is no excuse! i shouldn't fail. :( this means my intellectual property assessment mark to date is a shameful 57% percent. i need to pull huge numbers on the finals. which is not likely coz i have a paper barely 16 hours before. i just want to kick myself.

but thankfully, the trade off was worth it. i had a 50% essay that was due just before this intellectual property paper and i was freaking out big time on it. i dedicated almost ALL my time to this single research paper..... i ate, slept and breathed ADR (alternate dispute resolution) for almost 2 weeks. when i found out that i had failed IP, my heart dropped. if i didn't pass this ADR major essay, i would have just given up. completely. got my paper back today. i scored 78% - a distinction. 2 more % and i would have snagged my first ever law HD. well, it didn't happen but i won't be complaining. the trade off was paid off. whether it was worth it, that's another story. nothing can justify a failure i reckon.

now... awaiting my ABUS presentation + case study marks, corporations law mid semester exam grades and ADR presentation marks. if only i can pull through..............