i need a boyfriend.

i look at all the girls around me, xing, mimi, caro, normah, queenin and whoever else around me, and see all happily attached and smitten to bits/blindness.

this is called envy. so what? i am not afraid to admit it. no i don't want any of their guys, no thank you. just one to call my own.

jealousy? maybe. not of them but of their happiness. i want a piece of it to. now don't you dare go saying being jealous and envious is a mean thing to do to friends or their happiness for that matter. come on, don't be one of those fakes like hello kitty is. we're all humans. i am perfectly entitled to feel that way so long as i don't resort to boyfriend-snatching which i won't. that's slutty.

i just need a boyfriend.

maybe then i'll be happy.